Some Monsters are Real

     When I was a child, I was often afraid to sleep in my room at night. I was afraid of the dark and afraid that a monster was under the bed or that large bugs were crawling on my covers. Often, I would cover my head to feel safe before calling out to mom.
     This is a normal part of childhood, I guess. We've all, at some time or other, been afraid of clowns, bugs and those proverbial "monsters!" But times have changed. It seems the world has become a scary place for real, not just in our childhood imaginations.
     In the 60's, when I was going up, we could leave our windows open at night. We'd fall asleep enjoying the fresh breeze, and the night sounds of crickets and frogs. But now I would never leave my windows up at night, especially if my grandchildren are staying. If the windows are up during the day, I close them at night and I lock them. We live in a small town of around 20,000 not in a metro area, but still not too far from where I live, about a year ago, an intruder crawled through an open window and assaulted a woman.
     News reports are becoming more prevalent about children disappearing from their beds while the family is sleeping. I friend I spoke with recently said her sons are grown but she and her husband are overprotective of their small daughter--she still sleeps with them at night. They are afraid to leave her alone in her room. Afraid of the "monsters," who seem to lurk where you least expect them. Like the people you trust to watch out for your children. From family members to babysitters, daycare providers, school teachers and military personnel-- unfortunately the "monsters" hide among the good in society. Now days, as parents and grandparents we have to scrutinize everyone--it's sad to know that anyone of these "good" people who surround our children could turn out to be the boogeyman. Times have changed.
     Granted, there have always been child predators but with the rise of the internet, and the click of a mouse these "monsters" have access to a world of info, that years ago wasn't as easily available. The rise of instant news brings us the reports of these predators faster too. There are also more people who populate the Earth--as The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children says we are a "global society."

     Educating our little ones on real "monsters" is helpful, although as parents and grandparents I'm not sure we'll ever be able to sleep well at night, again.

The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children suggests these tips for educating children:
 Knowing My Rules for Safety

I CHECK FIRST with my parents, guardians, or other trusted adults before going anywhere, helping anyone, accepting anything, or getting into a car.

I TAKE A FRIEND with me when going places or playing outside.

I TELL people "NO" if they try to touch me or hurt me. It’s OK for me to stand up for myself.

I TELL my trusted adult if anything makes me feel sad, scared, or confused.
Sometimes there are people who trick or hurt others. No one has the right to do that to you. So use these rules, and remember you are STRONG, are SMART, and have the right to be SAFE. Always

CHECK FIRST
TAKE A FRIEND
TELL PEOPLE “NO” IF THEY TRY TO TOUCH YOU OR HURT YOU
TELL AN ADULT YOU TRUST IF ANYTHING HAPPENS

On Death and Dying

     My daughter told me on Memorial Day that the kids were painting happy pictures for Poppy and me, because so many people had died on this day and they wanted to cheer us up. She also said the three of them had become preoccupied with her death and our death and what would happen to them if we all died.
     I think there must be a certain age when kids become aware of death--her children are 10, eight and four. I remember worrying about my mom dying when I was a child, maybe around the age of eight to 10. She had told me if anything ever happened to her, I'd go live with my pastor's family. The reasoning behind this was, she had no family near by and my father wouldn't have been able to raise me on his own due to addiction problems.

     Possibly the fears of death for my grandchildren have been reinforced by recent events. Twelve weeks ago today my best friend passed away--Delisa Curtis Cox--a beautiful spirited woman, who loved God, family and helping others. She brought sunshine and music to a room, she brought grace, smiles and respect to all those around her. Never would I have thought she would leave us so young and so early, at age 50 with stage four cancer. She always loved children, and although her two son's are married she didn't have any grandchildren of her own yet. I always thought she would grow old continuing to help people and that and her house would be full of family and beautiful curly headed grandchildren. My grandchildren saw the sadness and loss I, and my other friend Lisa Weisgerber, felt--we had been three childhood friends--now there was just the two of us...

From left, Delisa Cox, myself and Lisa Weisgerber

     When she passed away Tuesday, March 6th, my daughter and her children went with us to Louisiana for the service. On a rainy Thursday, we drove across states, rain coming down in sheets for 12 hours--it seemed the whole of heaven was weeping for the loss on Earth of such a beautiful soul. Soon after her memorial service, the music store where Shiann takes violin lessons had a sudden loss, also. A guitar teacher in his 50's suddenly and unexpectedly died, leaving everyone who knew him shocked at the loss.
     Then the Saturday, before Memorial Day, the grandkid's former school librarian, age 38, died after a six year battle with brain cancer. She leaves behind small children and husband. On Sunday, a woman their mother works with lost her 48 year old husband to a sudden heart problem. Another, sudden loss.
     After so many loses soon the world, to a child, takes on a sinister slant and an ominous cloud hangs over the brightness of childhood. It does for adults, too. There are some questions to life where there are no answers. Where it seems God has chosen to become a silent observer. We are taught not to question Him, but in our hearts we do, because we are only human.
     We can only comfort the living, while trying not to think about our own mortality. We cling to the brightness of knowing and hoping the ones we love are in a better place. And, we hold them in our hearts as sacred treasures. In December before my friend, Delisa, passed away she told me she'd had a dream of us running in a field together,  holding hands--we were laughing and happy. I believe we will again someday...

Flags and Flowers

     Today is Memorial Day--the signal for summer and a day to remember our relatives who have passed on and those Veterans who have served our Country. On Saturday, we took five of our grandkids to the cemetery to place flowers on my mom and dad's graves. Our daughter Melissa was the one who remembered to gather the flowers and suggest we go. As usual the cemetery was beautiful, masses of flowers, hanging baskets, wind chimes and American flags waving in the warm southern breeze. For a couple of the grandkids this was their first time to a graveyard. They were fascinated with the flowers and flags.
     Little Boo Boo age three wanted to gather the flowers from the graves and we had to explain to her why she couldn't. Then all five wanted to know about the flags and if the Veteran's all had died in the war or only half of them. I told the kids that some may have died in wars but many came home and died in old age here in America. Soon they saw a marble statue of Jesus--hands outstretched--and they began to run toward Him saying, "Let's run to Jesus!"

     Across the sunlit grass among the flags and flowers, across the field of dead, the field of green grass they ran  little people full of life, dressed in colorful summer clothes, giggling, waving their arms. I watched transfixed in their joy of life and sun, and summer, and flags and flowers, and Jesus, and all that children see that we don't take time for any more. I soon followed. They were touching the toes of Jesus and sitting on the brick wall surrounding the figure, and dancing in the cool green of the grass. Soon little Joe looked up and said, "Is Jesus buried here too?"
     "No," I said. And I explained again what the statue symbolized and how the scripture Matthew 11:28 inscribed there, "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest," meant--that when you lose someone you love and feel very sad, Jesus is there to help you and make you feel better. (That was my interpretation, I guess the scripture was really talking to those who had died receiving rest, but they kids seemed pleased with my logic.)
     Soon all the suntanned legs ran back to their great grandparent's graves and prepared to leave. On our way out, we drove around looking at the splendor of flagged and flowered graves. If those buried there could see, I'm sure they smiled at the sight of little children skimming across the grass bringing life, love and laughter to the quietness. As we drove away ShiAnn age 10 said, "I feel very sad for all these people, some of them are very old." Three year old, Annalynn replied solemnly, "Yeah, and some of them died." Out of the mouth of babes...

Dogs, Dirt and Part of the Pack

     I woke up at 5:00 a.m.--my head hurt, my arms hurt so by 5:30 I decided to get up, go take an Ibuprofen and try to sleep in my office on the futon until 6:00. I knew at 6:00 both greyhounds would wake up like clockwork and be ready to go outside. Prancing, dancing with their tongues hanging out in fresh faced grins! The cat, Mallory, came into the office with me --just to monitor my whereabouts. Honestly I think the cat and dogs work together.
     Soon she jumped off the futon and went into the back of the house--and then I heard the click-clack of Dottie's feet. She loves my office, and she was coming in gently, quietly to check on me. It was 5:48 a.m.....Ugh! Daylight was creeping through the blinds--sleeping was finished. Might as well face the day with my happy hounds.
     Well she gently sniffed me with a most pleased look, and of course, I couldn't just lay there and disappoint her! As I got up she wagged her tail. But, down the hall I could hear Ace laying on his fluffy bed whining--I'm guessing the cat heard Ace whining, so she went to investigate--Dottie very tired of hearing Ace cry in his bed decided to find me herself and take care of the situation! Just like a woman! For some reason it hasn't dawned on Ace that he can come find me too--he just lays there and cries.
     Anyway, I'm up early with swollen eyes (allergies I guess), the hounds eat, play in the yard, and chase and bark at squirrels and Mallory sits in the grass daring us to come get her while Roy and I have coffee on the deck. Then we all go for a 3/4-mile walk. Except the cat.
     Walking makes me remember how when we first got Dottie, last December, she wasn't fond of the grand kids, although Ace loves them to death. Over the last several months she's began to recognize them as part of our "pack." She has her special spot by a large tree in the backyard where she and Ace try digging to China everyday. She also loves to lay in the dusty hole/holes they've created. Well, yesterday Drew was using the Tonka trucks to dig and load "Dottie's" dirt. She observed him for a while then came over and curled up in her dusty-hole.  I figured she was going to be incensed and make Drew leave but no--she apparently thought he was a pup who loved to dig, and that was quite all right with her, and she wold share her dirt.

Drew is now part of Dottie's "pack!"

     Sometimes I think I should have been an animal behaviorist--I just love watching how they all interact with each other. Actually my childhood friend told me last year, that instead of me wanting to be the "kid" when we played house as children, I always wanted to be the dog or cat!! I would crawl around on my hands and knees either meowing or barking. She told me laughing, "We never could figure out what you wanted, you wouldn't speak English!" Strange...I don't remember that at all--but it fits my personality to to tee. I'm just glad they let me be part of their "pack!"

Summer begins!

     So today, summer began--the grand kids are out of school for their first full day and they spent it with me! We took the greyhounds Ace and Dottie for a walk, ate Popsicles, harvested leaves from the "Magic Tree," (a  catulpa), made a tent with sheets, water colored and played in the dirt (dug by the hounds.) Actually the kids did most of these activities--except for walking the hounds. I thought that might end badly if the hounds decided to chase a squirrel! 

     Miss Mallory the cat came outside for a rare view of the world and she decided to play and roll in the dirt too!! Yay for me! Shiann and I tried to pat her clean and puff her clean but to no avail!! So to the tub she went, yes the tub. The last time I tried to scrub a cat, I was 4 and was almost clawed to death. I also at the same age, out of curiosity, put a clothespin on a cat's tail, but that's another story....So needless to say I was a little worried, but she was fairly cooperative. Shiann helped me dry her and Miss Mallory is no worse for the wear.
     Now we wait for Mama and Poppy to come home so we can all go out to eat and then to Drew's (age 8) first ever baseball game.